Another Dog Joke
The Americans and Russians at the height of the arms race realized
that if they continued in the usual manner they were going to blow up
the whole world.
One day they sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with
one dog fight. They would have five years to breed the best fighting
dog in the world and which ever side's dog won would be entitled to
dominate the world. The losing side would have to lay down its arms.
The Russians found the biggest meanest Doberman and Rottweiler
females in the world and bred them with the biggest meanest
Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy
from each litter, killed his siblings, and gave him all the milk. They
used steroids and trainers and after five years came up with the
biggest meanest dog the world had ever seen. Its cage needed steel
bars that were five inches thick and nobody could get near it.
When the day came for the dog fight, the Americans showed up with
a strange animal. It was a nine foot long Dachshund. Everyone felt
sorry for the Americans because they knew there was no way that
this dog could possibly last ten seconds with the Russian dog.
When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of it's
cage and slowly waddled over towards the Russian dog. The Russian
dog snarled and leaped out of it's cage and charged the American
dachshund. But, when it got close enough to bite the Dachshund's
neck, the Dachshund opened it's mouth and consumed the Russian
dog in one bite. There was nothing left at all of the Russian dog.
The Russians came up to the Americans shaking their heads in
disbelief. "We don't understand how this could have happened. We
had our best people working for five years with the meanest
Doberman and Rottweiler females in the world and the biggest
meanest Siberian wolves."
"That's nothing", an American replied. "We had our best plastic
surgeons working for five years to make an alligator look like a