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Old 09-21-2009, 04:11 PM   #1 (permalink)
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*why women shouldn't take men shopping**

*After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred
to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from
the local Target.

Dear Mrs.Samsel,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our
store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of
you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samsel, are
listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's
carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away! This caused the employee to
leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that
in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and
costing t he company money..

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7... August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and
screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called..

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the
'Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by
using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed
a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then
yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the
clerks passed out.
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Old 09-21-2009, 04:21 PM   #2 (permalink)
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hahahahahaha this is way too funny
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Old 11-22-2009, 03:01 PM   #3 (permalink)
 
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omg to funny
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Old 11-22-2009, 03:08 PM   #4 (permalink)
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ahahahaha thats some funny stuff
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Old 05-25-2010, 02:17 PM   #5 (permalink)
 

eddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond repute
eddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond reputeeddy has a reputation beyond repute
its more like why men shouldnt go with women shoping
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Old 05-25-2010, 10:42 PM   #6 (permalink)
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ROFLMAO!!! OMG! Why am I just now seeing this!? That's just crazy! I like #3 the best! But the last one definately took the cake on this list!!
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Old 07-08-2010, 04:41 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Way To Funny
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Old 07-08-2010, 05:10 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Hey Marty
That was to much-I'm still rolling on the floor.I will send that around to my friend's and I know they will love it.
Thank you for sharing.
Henry
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Old 07-12-2010, 04:45 PM   #9 (permalink)
 
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omg soooo funny!!! yes I am late on this one too!
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Old 07-14-2010, 04:45 PM   #10 (permalink)
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thats funny
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Old 08-16-2010, 05:56 PM   #11 (permalink)
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ROFFL OMG I AM ROLLING!!!!! THIS WAS GREAT
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Old 08-16-2010, 06:08 PM   #12 (permalink)
 
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LMAO very funny
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Old 11-28-2010, 12:48 AM   #13 (permalink)
 
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love it!!!!!!!
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Old 01-03-2011, 08:23 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Because women were perceived as oppressed in the past, therefore it's un-PC for men to do anything less than stand on the corner whipping themselves for being men.







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