folks don't know the true effect about weapons,the damage trajectories cause unless they've been in that gory moment.
cause and effect.you go through such A range of emotion.
fear,euphoria,fear,power,fear,and then the adreniline of the moment.then the moment wains.and you look down,theirs A body.then you think about the mission.theirs so many lives.they are all reeling,some know some don't some will never know who or why.
then you go home,you take A stiff drink.your sitting in your favorite easy chair,wondering if the cops are coming.you can't sleep,you toss you turn,you wake up in A cold sweat.the dog licks your face and you push it away.then you draw it near.she knows she knows your not an animal,yet your actions tell A different story.
you wake up,you go and account for your affairs, you collect the balance. still in fear because your being grilled by someone who could be as unconcerned for you as they were for the mark.you try to sound sure and confident without sounding to cocky.the woman you work for is truly La Bruja as they call her on the street.knowing it could be your time as easily as the one before you.
when you turn to walk away you look your mom in the eye,and say 'I love you" knowing you do,does she love you?